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Movies for Valentine's Day - Contains Spoilers

With that fateful day representing love and passion quickly approaching, there has been a grand resurgence of lists on the internet stating what we should and should not do / wear / say / buy / watch to ensure that we exude the appropriate amount of romance to that special someone.  So much pressure.

I'm not going to get into my cynical opinion on how commercialism preys upon our insecurities surrounding social acceptance.  Not today anyway.

I do, however, feel a need, no, a compulsion to share a list of movies that are romantic enough to satisfy the requirements yet are tolerable.  The lists I have read on the internet are wrong.  They are filled with films that are old, cheezy, predictable and boring.

Here's the reel <pun intended> shit, in no particular order:

1. The Princess Bride - The best kiss ever and, a man who says "As you wish."
2. Practical Magic - A young witch casts a spell wishing for a man so perfect he couldn't possibly exist, so to never have her heart broken.  Midnight Margaritas; the best idea.
3. Ladyhawke - A curse keeps the two apart; she is a hawk by day and he is a wolf by night. Great action.
4. The Notebook - In the first 5 minutes, the now elderly man says, "I've lived as glorious a life as any other for I have loved another with all of my heart and soul; my life has been a success."  Dab a tear and toss him (or her) a loving glance after that line and you will get laid for sure.  And, you don't need to watch the whole movie.
5. Donny Darko - The ultimate unrequited love; after knowing the future, he allows himself to die before meeting her in order to save her life.  May need to watch it twice; it's a little complicated.
6. Labyrinth - Though David Bowie is an evil stalker, baby-snatcher from the Underworld, you have to melt a little when he sings, "Everything I've done, I've done for you. I move the stars for no one."

So, my apologies to Pretty Woman, Gone with the Wind, When Harry Met Sally and every other movie that makes my eyes roll until they hurt.

I choose to be awake at the end of the film to enjoy the spoils of my good selections.

Night Shift - Easily Entertained

Movies for Kids - Contains Spoilers?

It's not enough that I take my own children to see or do something totally inappropriate, I have to take a couple of their friends along as well.  I would hate to have my poor parenting go unnoticed in the community.

Tonight the collection of 13 to 16 year olds chose to see the movie, Good Luck Chuck, starring sweet, little Jessica Alba as a clumsy, pony-tailed, penguin trainer and Dane Cook as dentist who is cursed to be unlucky in love.  A charming romantic-comedy, I was certain of it.

The movie was rated 18A; needed adult accompaniment, no big deal, that can mean that someone says sh*t.  As the accompanying adult, however, I likely should have checked.  If I had, I may have been told that it is actually porn!

Millions of breasts, major nakedness and....oh so many more..... positions of comfort than most people know after their second divorce.  Oh, and lets not forget the graphic explanation of how one should slightly warm a grapefruit prior to using it for self-gratification.  What?