Watch this. I'm going to pretend like I have not been missing for (counting fingers) five months.
I would have had troubles justifying to my latest employer that I was unable to successfully prepare for whichever evaluation because I had to keep the world informed about, well, me. The ending of that last sentence was going to say something deep about astute global observations and civilization-altering politics but we all know that there would be little accuracy in that.
In breaking news, I saw the new Star Trek Movie; on a DVD with Serbian sub-titles in my quasi-barrack prison-style room in Belgrade a couple of weeks ago. Apparently, that may have been illegal by some copyright rules or something but, nonetheless I enjoyed it. Star Trek; who would have thought. When I later read something in entertainment news (the real news) praising Winona Ryder's return to the big screen, I had to immediately consult the all-knowing Google authorities to figure out what role she had played because I hadn't seen her. Was my illegal Serbian copy a total fake shot in some Trekky computer geek's basement? Did she play one of the cleverly disguised aliens that spent more time in the make-up chair than on the set? No, she just got old! She has very suddenly gone from the freaky girl who acted in the likes of Beetlejuice, Heathers and Edward Scissorhands to Spock's Mom! I figure that this must have happened about the time that I woke up and found teenagers in my house that apparently belong to me.
In other news, Liam-the-fourteen-year-old boy left to visit family and friends in Canada for half of the summer. I would like to thank Flight Aware, the online flight tracker, for saving some poor KLM employee from nine hours of harassing phone calls from a seemingly crazy parent asking if they were sure that KLM682 was still in the air. Liam was unfortunate enough to have his first solo flight be a Trans-Atlantic so while I stressed just a little, he calmly prepared by watching past episodes of Lost to ensure that he knew how to survive on a deserted island. That's my boy. One day I would really like to get a good look at the pathways in that brain.
Next step, I have to re-learn how to change my banner picture. It seems that not everyone is as fond of the Snowbabies as I am; you know who you are.
